11/2/25

The mask that people wear over themselves has many different forms and reasons behind them. Some people put on that mask because they are scared of people knowing the “real them”. Some people have it on because they don’t know how to take off. There are many other reasons people protect that mask on their face, the mask that is always smiling but sometimes when you find someone or something you find out that that mask is not something to be proud of. If the monkey finds something to be proud of then over time it becomes more comfortable in itself. Knowing that no matter what it will be loved and appreciated. The monkey doesn’t need to be afraid of themself if they know that that’s the best part of them. The mask may shatter and crack but the person under it never will.

Hannah Win Or Lose story:

8/4/25

Hannah never had many friends and always found herself chasing after other kids for their attention and approval. She didn’t have many interests of her own and always tried to like everything other people liked. If her “friends” liked makeup she’d like makeup. If her friends wanted to dye their hair, then she would dye her hair. She was scared of rejection, and this pressure slowly started building. Trying to like everything and nothing and everything and nothing all at the same time was trying. She didn’t know how to handle it. She looked for help, but none was there. When she tried to talk to her “friends” they just left, reminding Hannah that they weren’t truly her friends but really just a distraction from her loneliness. She kept seeking attention from others when she heared about the little league softball team. Out of desperation she decided to join. Immediately when she did she found herself shrouded by friends and warmth. She hadn’t felt anything so friendly before. For the first time she had friends who didn’t expect anything in return from her. But there was always this aching feeling of trying to please. If she heard her friend liked something she tried to like it too, to make sure they didn’t leave. She was scared that if she was herself that even her true friends would leave her. This fear of abandonment kept growing. It was engulfing. Suffocating. So she came to the conclusion that, to not be scared of abandonment, she had to have no one that could abandon her. No one can hurt you if there’s no one to hurt you. So she decided that after the championship game, she would leave the Pickles and isolate herself. Then she would finally be free from the fear of loneliness.

Hannah Win Or Lose revition activity:

16/4/25

I walked towards the bathroom, because Stayce told us to meet up in the girls bathroom now. My footsteps were loud as I walked through the empty hall because everyone was still in class. My breath was slightly heavy, and my heart was pounding so fast, I could almost hear it. It was loud. I don’t like loud noises.

I turned the corner to the bathroom, and slowly opened the plastic door. Stayce and two other girls that I hadn’t met before were already there. Stayce was applying some light pink lipstick, and the other two were braiding each other's hair.

“Hey, guys.” I said nervously, clenching the straps of my backpack.

Stayce turned her head to look at me, and in unison the other two girls did too. “Omg! Hi!” She said, exaggerating the “I” a lot. “We were totally waiting for you, gurl.”

“Who’s she?” One of the two girls said, with slight judgment in her tone.

Stayce turned her attention back to the two girls “She’s Hanna, my bestie. She’s cool, so don’t worry,” Then Stayce turned to me once more, “this is Jenny,” she said pointing to one of the girls. Jenny had pale skin, and brunette hair, with a long neck, and a slim skinny body, “and this is Penny,” she said pointing to the other girl. Penny had black skin, and frizzy hair, she had gyaru makeup on, and was chewing gum loudly.

“Hi, it’s nice to meet you two,” I said awkwardly.

“Yeah. Cool.” Jenny said, sounding unimpressed by my uncomfortable demeanor.

I kept standing there nervously, not knowing what to do. Penny turned her head towards Stayce and away from me, “oh! Stayce, have you like, heard of like new rumors going around?”

Then they started gossiping and muttering to each other, completely ignoring my existence. I was used to this feeling, but I didn’t like it. My arms start to feel itchy and my palms start to sweat, I look around the room frantically, I can’t say exactly why though. 

“Tom’s brother is in the hospital!” I hear myself say. They turn to me, looking surprised and intrigued. They start bombarding me with comments and questions that I have no answer to. My ears start ringing, and my breath becomes louder, and louder, so do their voices, louder and louder. I can’t think properly with all this noise, I want to run away from it, and yet I’m paralyzed still.